Success, Insecurity, and A Crappy Outro
Sunday, February 28, 2010 by Mandy (ZenMonkeyMind)
Hey! guess what! I did it! I posted every day in February for NaBloPoMo!
Granted, most of my posts were pretty lame. I am a blogger, not a writer. A lot of people are both, and I envy those people.
I'm trying to decide if I should do NaBloPoMo for March? I might give it a try, even though I said I wasn't going to.
In other news, I feel kind of bad that I haven't made it back to the gym sine Friday evening. I am going tomorrow, for my very first Cardio Kickboxing class! I'm excited about this. I haven't been doing the strength training as much as I should, and I know it's important. I don't know what my problem is with that. I have this weird insecurity, I feel like such a fool when I am wandering through all the fancy muscle torture machines they have. It's silly, and I know this isn't true, but I can't help but feel like people will be looking at me, and know I don't know what the hell I am doing. Especially the trainer I had my first day there. Like I said, silly, I know. But I picture him watching my every move, and thinking to himself "That's not what I was teaching her! She shouldn't be doing that! I just knew she should have signed up for my services!"
Shaking his head in shame. Being laughed at behind my back by all the gym super stars. People staring at me because I am not "doing it right."
Why am I such a paranoid and insecure freak when it comes to this stuff??
Anyway, I'm not going to let my neurotic ways stop me. Kickboxing tomorrow night, and then during the day Tuesday I will go make a fool of myself with the fancy muscle torture devices. Haha.
So, If I were a writer, as opposed to just a blogger, this is where I would segway into some seamless "outro" to end my post eloquently. Instead, you get this. :)
Granted, most of my posts were pretty lame. I am a blogger, not a writer. A lot of people are both, and I envy those people.
I'm trying to decide if I should do NaBloPoMo for March? I might give it a try, even though I said I wasn't going to.
In other news, I feel kind of bad that I haven't made it back to the gym sine Friday evening. I am going tomorrow, for my very first Cardio Kickboxing class! I'm excited about this. I haven't been doing the strength training as much as I should, and I know it's important. I don't know what my problem is with that. I have this weird insecurity, I feel like such a fool when I am wandering through all the fancy muscle torture machines they have. It's silly, and I know this isn't true, but I can't help but feel like people will be looking at me, and know I don't know what the hell I am doing. Especially the trainer I had my first day there. Like I said, silly, I know. But I picture him watching my every move, and thinking to himself "That's not what I was teaching her! She shouldn't be doing that! I just knew she should have signed up for my services!"
Shaking his head in shame. Being laughed at behind my back by all the gym super stars. People staring at me because I am not "doing it right."
Why am I such a paranoid and insecure freak when it comes to this stuff??
Anyway, I'm not going to let my neurotic ways stop me. Kickboxing tomorrow night, and then during the day Tuesday I will go make a fool of myself with the fancy muscle torture devices. Haha.
So, If I were a writer, as opposed to just a blogger, this is where I would segway into some seamless "outro" to end my post eloquently. Instead, you get this. :)
Posts
I hate ending posts and coming up with titles!
Good for you! NaBloPoMo kicked my butt back in November. I give you so much credit for even entertaining the idea of going two months in a row!
I feel that way too. Once you get into it, you'll be really comfortable using the equipment. Titles? Brilliant post endings? I can't do it.
Congrats. You may find you are more of a weekday rather than weekend gym person.
Do you have a buddy to do the torture with. It's so much more fun to be a fool with someone, especially someone even more of fool than you. : )
I think any kind of exercising is like that. When you're new to it, it's hard, and you feel insecure. But if you keep at it, you'll feel more confident. You can do it!!
Yes, endings are the toughest part of the blog posts that I write, especially when it is just me rambling to my friends. It is a little easier if I am trying to make a point about a specific topic or thought that I have been having. And hey, you can never go wrong with a smiley face at the end :)
i used to consider myself a runner and now its been nearly a year since I ran. i was inspired by you to start the c25k plan, but I am so paranoid about people seeing me running. "she only made it 2 blocks. what a loser" "her butt jiggles when she runs." I too am insecure, but I will crank up the music and ignore the voices in my head. have fun at kickboxing!!
Kickboxing sounds like fun! I know what you mean about going to the gym and feeling like everyone is watching you, which is why I work out at home. Well, that and we live in the middle of nowhere and the closest gym is sixteen miles away. Congrats on making it through February on NaBloPoMo. I felt pretty motivated about February, but not so much about March, but we'll see....